Goodbye then.....

I had to tell her. I’d been playing the charade for way too long. As I stepped outside the subway a light drizzle started wafting through the air. While the 7 pm crowd started scrambling for cover all around me, I walked on - feeling nothing. I picked up a bunch of daisies at the corner of 5^th and Cedar. Ed ignored me as usual and I left dropping a sheaf of dollar notes on the table.

I steeled my nerves as I ambled past the garden, up the driveway and knocked on 412. The door opened and there she was – an absolute knockout, wearing her fantastic smile that always made my day. Well, no more after tonight.I had to be fair to her and allow her to move on…. I had to be fair to myself and let go!!

I had to tell her that on January 2^nd I had in fact never made it to work, that if she had turned on the 8 ‘o clock news she’d have seen a blue suburban being hauled out of the Cherokee with no sign of survivors. Deep breath - “I’ve got something to tell you. I’ve been …… been …. ”, somehow I couldn’t say it, to say it would be to acknowledge it. “Dead for over 6 weeks now?” she interrupted with a smile “I knew the minute it happened….. I’ve been waiting for 5 years now…. welcome home”.